MAN+MAN= BAD PARENTING

  Close mindedness or scientifically proven? Legalization of same sex marriages has been making progress in countries around the globe. Supreme courts especially in states in western countries have made it possible for same sex couples to enjoy and live their lives just like heterosexual couples. Despite only 81 countries around the globe known to have gay marriages as illegal, people continue to get into the lives of gay couples. Some go to the extent of deeming gay couples as ‘unfit for parenting’ If you are one of these people, this blog might just change your mind.

In places like Russia, gay parents are not allowed to adopt. Am sure many of us want to have children when we grow up. What if you were denied that opportunity because of your sexual orientation? I think we would all be devastated if this were to happen to us. This feeling is no different in LGBT couples who most often anticipate with much dedication to raise children. In countries where adoption by same sex couples is illegal, LGBT couples have to fight a battle of emotions as their dreams of becoming parents are crushed. 

 This couple on the left, Michael George and Chad Lord have been waiting almost six years for the opportunity to adopt a child. In their preparation to parenthood, the two bought a house, put furniture the baby’s room and even had an extra room intended for George’s mother who would move in once the baby arrived, yet they have been ‘un lucky’ when it comes to adopting a child. To add insult to injury, on different occasions, the received hoax phone calls from birthmothers who offered to let them adopt their children. Despite all these, they still persevere with the hope that they will one day have a child of their own as Lord says, “We want a baby. We want a family. We want kids. We're going to be good dads."(Johnson).

A variety of research that has been conducted proved that gay parenting is just as good as straight parenting and in some cases, it might be better than straight parenting. One in particular, which was conducted by Clark University, concluded that gay parenting is better than straight parenting. “Gay parents "tend to be more motivated, more committed than heterosexual parents on average, because they chose to be parents," said Abbie Goldberg, a psychologist at Clark University in Massachusetts” ( Pappas). This was the main idea behind their conclusions. With statistics showing that, almost 50% of children of heterosexual couples in the United States are unexpected, this further proves their findings.

                          

Another research conducted by University of Melbourne showed that children of same sex couples were better than those of straight couples in terms of general health and family cohesion. The only difference between the two was the discrimination that same sex couples children face due to the sexual orientation of their parents (Crouch). This study shows that negativity towards gay couples not only has a negative impact on the parents but also on their children. Both these studies show that one’s sexual orientation does not affect the ability of a person to raise a child/children.

Its time we move on and embrace change in our society. Were are where we are because of change that occurred from BC to the 21^st century. There have major advancements in technology and people seem to be all right with these changes. The same attitudes should be present when it comes to LGBT. Not accepting change can limit the growth of a nation/community. The world would be a better place if we keep our differences aside and accept people of all kind. 

Questions

1)      What factors contribute to the popular belief that the formula to a well functioning parent in a father and a mother?

2)      Many same sex couples look towards adoption to have a child. If you gave up your child for adoption, would you allow them to be adopted by a homosexual pair? Explain

3)      What factors do you think contribute to raising a ‘grounded child’?

Works Cited

Johnson, S. "A Same-sex Couple's Struggle to Adopt." JOHNS HOPKINS                           

MAGAZINE 10 Sept. 2013: n. pag. Web. 31 May 2014.

Pappas, S. "Gay Parents Better Than Straight Parents? What Research Says."        

            Web log post. The Huffington Post. N.p., 16 Jan. 2012. Web. 31 May 2014.

Crouch, S.  David, E.  and Waters. E. "ACHESS – The Australian Study of Child Health            

            in Same-sex Families." BMC Public Health (2012): n. pag. Web. 31 May 2014.

Addressing the Cons to Feminism (Become An Equalist instead)

(Please note that I fully support the following statement.)

Feminism: the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.

            I brought this topic up for 2 reasons, why don’t more men become feminists & to shed light on feminist radicalism. When pondering the question if I consider myself a feminist I realized that a lot of other males I know won’t identify as feminists. I remember a comment on the gender equality myth or reality blog post had a few theories, but as a male with lots of male friends and I feel these theories don’t apply to most males. After brainstorming and thinking back on why they don’t like feminism I realized that they don’t understand the difference between normal feminism and radical feminism. They probably ran into these radical feminists and thought “Every woman who supports their own rights will attack me like this, best not associate myself with them.” Now some of you guys reading this might be wondering what radical feminism is. Radical feminism is a call to reorder society to give power over to women because powerful men use the current norm and the government as a means to oppress women. There might be some truth to that statement, but the main problem is their means of doing this. They decide to advocate the idea by exerting dominance over men and oppressing them. They then go on to justify this by showing this is the only way to even the scale.  To them, having troubles with a small group of people that are part of a larger collective is reason enough to attack the whole collective group. 

This is where the double standard comes from. There are a lot of feminists who advocate rights for women because they claim that they hate sexism, but do not attempt to stop sexism against men or lack of rights towards men. For example the Selective Service System in the United States forces all men between the ages of 18 and 25 to go to war if voluntary troops need backup. This is obviously sexist as women cannot be drafted while men can even though women can easily become soldiers. If these feminists truly want to have equality they must fight for women to be drafted or stop drafting all together.

            

Still don’t believe me, watch this video. (This video has mild swearing, if you are unable to handle that level of content please do not watch)

From this video you can see that there is a large group of radical feminists out there. Of course many of you fight that does not represent all of feminism and you would be right. Many feminists are good people who truly want equality, but in any group the extremists speak the loudest. People, especially sexist men, can use this as a way to demote feminism as a whole.

Their views even affect our own because we hold double standards with female roles even in normal situations. Examples being: ladies first, take all women and children to safety, a woman can slap a guy if she is offended by his dialogue, a woman can kick a guy for the same reasons, and many more situations like these. Here is a video that address the same issue. (This video has suggestive content, but no form of nudity. If you cannot handle this level of content please do not watch)

          My ending point is this: feminism at its core isn't bad, but can easily be twisted by the ones who practice it and the ones who want to stop it. For me personally I found that being a humanist or an equalist (keep in mind I couldn't find the exact term that explains this belief perfectly) is the best thing to be. This cause intends to give fairness and respect to all ages, gender, race, sexualities, and other groups of people by giving everyone equal opportunity to prove themselves as respectable people, without bias based on who or what they are.  Because I try to focus on equality to all directions of humanity it cannot be swayed one way or the other unlike feminism. 

Now that you have ready my post here are a few questions.

Do you agree or disagree with my opinions of feminism? Why or Why Not?

What is your opinion on the gender role of the army and its Selective Service System?

If you are a feminist do you acknowledge that there are radicals out there and that is your job to stop them to protect your movement?

 If you are not a feminist currently, can you explain why you are not and explain how this post may have affected your stance?

Do you think that more people should rally behind humanism/equal-ism?

Works Cited

Harris, Tom. "HowStuffWorks "How the U.S. Draft Works"" HowStuffWorks. N.p., n.d. Web. 24 May     2014.

"Radical Feminism." Princeton University. N.p., n.d. Web. 26 May 2014.

Dean, Jonathan. "Radical Feminism: What It Is and Why We're Afraid of It."Theguardian.com. Guardian     News and Media, 09 Feb. 2011. Web. 26 May 2014

"Different Types of Feminist Theories." Caragills. N.p., n.d. Web. 26 May 2014.

That's So Gay!

“That’s So Gay!” 

How are men protaryed in the Media?

     Everywhere you look these days, you can’t stay away from the topic of homosexuality. It’s in the magazines we read and the television shows we watch. Due to the fact that they are a minority group, people assume homosexuality as being very different from everybody. The negative connotation associated especially with homosexual men has made us accept some of the stereotypes and generalizations towards this group of people. As people learn to understand more about homosexuality, they have a better understanding of the stigma associated with the term. Do you think that the media portrays homosexuality as a negative more than a positive?

     Recently, I’ve noticed that media has had more actors playing homosexual roles. This can obviously be seen in the second highest viewed television series called “Modern Family.” When homosexual couples come to mind, one thingThat most people ask is “ who wears the pants in the relationship”. This phrase is associated with gender roles, which leads to the stereotype that homosexual men in relationships need a passive role and dominant role in order to be consider normal. But what is normal and will homosexual couples ever get the same treatment as heterosexual couples?   

     Referring back to Modern Family, the Mother Day episode portrayed a very interesting insight to the gender role of Cam and Mitchell (the Gay couple on the show). As the couple was strolling down the park, they questioned themselves on which of them was more feminine. As a football rolled towards Cam, he attempted to throw it far to prove he was more masculine. His bad throw lead to a bicyclist being hit in the head and falling horribly. The shows comedic twist to the episode shined light on the belief that society has when it comes to homosexual gender roles and masculinity. The biggest way Modern Family probably challenges the gay stereotype is by adopting a child named Lily. In our society we do not see men as being capable enough to have a child without a women figure in the picture. Our society think homosexuals are not affectionate towards children. Cam and Mitchell are very open to adoption on the show, which proves that they are good parents. This obviously shows that they are challenging society’s perception on gay men.

     In this current society, we generalize gay men as being feminine and flamboyant. The media portrays homosexual men as being uninterested in sports and more feminine than masculine. But what makes gay men more feminine than heterosexual men? When Jason Collins, an athletic, masculine NBA players announced he was gay, it proved to many people that Gay men just like Heterosexual men, are all different.   In Ontario, same-sex marriage was legalized on June 10th, 2003, which proves that society is starting to understand the importance of equality in our society. Shortly afterwards NFL prospect Michael Sam came out of the closet on draft day. In Michael’s house when he received the phone call, ESPN camera’s swarmed in as Michael bursted into tears and kissed his soulmate. Jason Collin’s responded to the first openly gay NFL player by simply saying “It was a great day for the NFL.”

     At this day and age, media has a huge impact on many people’s lives especially people living in the west. The portrayal of homosexuals in the media sends both intentional and unintentional messages to viewers. These messages have a huge impact on how we view homosexuality and its important to understand the stereotypes and generalizations associated to the term homosexuality. I want to end this post with a question: "10 years from now, do you think society will change their views on Homosexuality in the media?"          

Work Cited:

Roush, C.,  Sampiller, N . , Schultz, M. et all. (n.d.)  “Protrayal of Homosexuality in the Media”. Retrieved  on May 22^nd, 2014 from, http://www2.bgsu.edu/departments/tcom/faculty/ha/tcom103fall2004/gp16/gp16.pdf

(N.a.) . (n.d).“Gay Stereotypes in Modern Family”.  Retrieved on May 25^th, 2014, from http://analysisofmodernfamily.weebly.com

Image Citations:

(N.a.) . (n.d).“Gay Stereotypes in Modern Family” [picture of Cam and Mitchell holding their adopted daughter].  Retrieved on May 25^th, 2014, from http://analysisofmodernfamily.weebly.com

(N.a.) . (n.d).“Gay Stereotypes in Modern Family”.  [ picture of man with makeup] Retrieved on May 25^th, 2014, from http://analysisofmodernfamily.weebly.com

NBA Media Ventures, 2014. [ Picture of Jason Collins]. Retrieved on May 27^th, from http://www.nba.com/playerfile/jason_collins/

How far are we influenced by the Social Media

Hello Everyone!

 

Let’s talk about the social media, shall we? Perhaps, also about how it influences our life by creating some ideal men and women figures. Sounds interesting, well, it is undeniable that the social media is one of the greatest inventions that have come along with the recent generation. It plays a vital role in our day-to-day life. It allows us to be informed, entertained, educated, and connected with different people regardless of geographical distances. It is also a good way for marketing and advertising ones product to the society. However, how realistic are these advertisements and how well do they represent the society?  

The media has completely changed the way people perceive beauty by displaying what they call the “idealistic and standard masculine and feminine figure.” Strangely these idealistic figures are almost unachievable by any average person. The media praises a macho, tough, arrogant and skirt chaser man and a tall, thin and long haired woman, other attributes such as personality and intelligence seem to have no place in categorizing men or women as ideal/ attractive. Something somewhere has gone wrong in this world. Instead of making intelligence, good personality and manners the ideal beauty, the media chooses something unattainable as if we are here to make each other’s life hard and    miserable.                                                                        

             Even though there are various positive impacts of the media, I believe its disadvantage outweighs the advantages. The Media constantly tells and manipulates both men and women that they need to have certain looks and sizes, in order to be able to fit in the society. The way media portrays beauty has great influence on the way men and women view themselves and it has become a major reason for many people to have a very low self-esteem and a feeling of unworthiness. 

             The media can also be the main reason for ending a number of romantic relationships, by making people feel insecure and live up to the unachievable expectations of the media.  Nowadays, many people compare their spouses to what they see on TV and in magazines, according to a survey made by the Teen Advisory Board (TAB), “75% said that social media affects romantic relationships “negatively,” 18% positively, and 7% said that social media had no effect.” (Anne Collier, teens on social media’s impact on relationships: survey)

             Sometimes I wonder if we would perceive the world differently if there was no such thing called “media”. A weird thought I know. But would we look at every human being equally, would we stop being judgmental and appreciate one another just the way we are? This question remains a mystery to me. So, please don’t hesitate to come up with your interpretation how you think the world would have been like. 

  Furthermore, boys and girls from a very young age look for men and women with ideal body shapes as role models. given that the media is trying to tell women that they are not pretty or skinny enough, they put an effort to have the body image that is described by media, consequently, they suffer from physical and mental problems such as; eating disorder and body image dissatisfaction.

From all the things mentioned above, one can have a clear understanding that media has changed the way we communicate and see things and its negative impacts outweigh the positive ones. Now the main question is, what can we do to prevent this? How can we stop ourselves from being influenced by the media?

 There are several ways that we could prevent ourselves from being influenced by the problems that social media is causing. Among those, discouraging the way media is portraying the human feminine beauty, convincing teenage girls by telling them that they are beautiful as they are and encouraging men and women to feel more confident about their looks might help to prevent the powerful influence of social media on society. I am sure there are many other ways to do this and I would love to hear from you, what do you think should be done to fight back the misrepresentation of male and female figures in the media?

   


                                                                   
                                                                   Works Cited


     Annie Collier. Teens on social media’s impact on relationships: survey. 23 January. 2014. Web.                    07 May. 2014.
     Tony Porter. “A call to men”. TED Talk. TED Talk, December 2010. Web. 11 May. 2014.